Having trouble sleeping?

Published 4:41 pm Tuesday, January 28, 2020

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Here is a prescription that is free although it takes a little work on your behalf. There is some technology involved, which puts it out of my ability to procure. The prescription involves the recording of portions of the most recent Senate trial involving the impeachment of the president.

As a preacher of 25 years, I have quite the point of view regarding people who are being put to sleep by listening to a boring speaker. I’m not always a boring speaker, but I have had my days! Plus, there are some people whose best “zzzz’s” come as the speaker’s voice drones on.

I looked up the word “drone.” One definition is “speak tediously in a dull, monotonous tone.” I can assure anyone. Preachers aren’t purposely boring. It’s just a gift.

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Let me not be too tough on preachers, though. How about teachers? We’ve all sat through that English or History lesson right after lunch and simply couldn’t keep our eyes open even if we had toothpicks to help. Those of us who have to continue our educations with so-called seminars, how hard is it to stay awake during those?

I have often thought. What if I could take this feeling of sleepiness that I am feeling during some boring presentation and “bottle it?” Then take a dose of it on those nights when sleep is most difficult. I could sell it and the only thing that would make me restless would be trying to figure out how to spend all the money made from Dr. Lynn’s Sleeping Potion.

I have plenty to do so I couldn’t spend the afternoon and night listening to Mr. Schiff. Adam Schiff, also known as “Shifty-Schiff,” was the lead presenter for the House Team requesting the impeachment and removal of President Donald John Trump. I listened some, but not much.

I’ll say this. Mr. Schiff was full of vim and vigor and very expressive, particularly with those eyes that seemed to want to pop out at times. He also seemed to appreciate his time before the Senate, but even as excited as he seemed to be, there were times when I remembered I had something else to do. That took about 2 minutes.

One thing that is sort of funny with all of these proceedings is how, seemingly, courteous they are with their adversaries. They call each other “My colleagues on the other side.” As they say that, they are trying to figure out how best to stick the knife in and twist it.

It’s all a big show, isn’t it? Only it isn’t an interesting show. It’s not even a new show. The House Team spends 3 days telling us stuff, again, that we have all heard at least 4 times. Then, the President’s team will tell us, one more time, what we have heard. Only they will say, “It ain’t true.” I would like to request one thing.

Instead of showing the speakers as he or she goes on and on, how about turning the cameras around so that I can see the senators and how they are responding. I have heard that the rules are fairly strict. The senators are compelled to be there.

Also, I understand that they cannot even speak to one another. There can be no conversation among the senators and the only beverages allowed on the floor are milk and water. Milk and Water!

Let’s see. Attendance is a must and there can be no talking. No coffee, no donuts, and they have to listen to boring speakers for hours. Now, if I could only figure out how to record it, but not for information. I need a sleeping aid!