Mother Nature brings us all together

Published 8:15 pm Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Uncle Sam may try, but falls way short of Mother Nature. What I mean is despite the divisiveness of our political persuasions, it only takes Mother Nature’s weather to bring us all together.

This past Friday, it did not matter whether you were buying a loaf of bread at the grocery store, picking up your laundry at the dry cleaners, or filling up your car at the gasoline station, the unanimous topic of conversation was the snow.

“It’s snowing in Blakely,” I heard more than once and there was great anticipation and hope in the voice. I guess they were excited about the mere possibility that Bainbridge might get snow.

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About five o’clock Friday afternoon, in the slight drizzle of rain, I was walking around the neighborhood getting in those steps that fellow columnist Jim Smith wrote about recently. I had my umbrella taut in my hand and protective of my head as I persevered. It was a pretty lonely walk.

Then, all of a sudden, the tiny drops of rain turned into huge flakes of snow. It took about two shakes of a lamb’s tail for the children to start spreading the news that it was snowing. They piled out of their houses, finally getting a chance to relieve themselves of that closed-school, cabin fever that they had been suffering through all day.

Since we don’t get much snow down here in Georgia, it doesn’t take any, in fact, to drive the decision to close our schools. Just the mere mention of snow in the weather forecast is enough to shutter the school system tighter than Dick’s hatband.

Moms and dads had to scurry around and alter work schedules for watching the children once schools were closed. Then, what to do with them as they kept looking outside wanting it to snow? Well, about five o’clock they could open the door and let ‘em go. It was snowing.

They ran around the front yards with their faces upward and their tongues out trying to catch a huge snowflake as it fell. The children were so excited, it made me excited.

I asked a few of them, “Does this mean we get to have Christmas all over again?”

They screamed in unison, “Yeahhhhhhhh!” I don’t think momma agreed.

Mother Nature had brought, not only South Georgia all together in great anticipation, she seemed to be calling the entire nation to unanimity. The talking heads on the television said that, for the first time in memory, it was snowing in all 50 states. I don’t know about that and I have long since stopped believing everything I hear on the tube.

Still it seemed that the East Coast, at least, was inundated with snow. I hear it was so cold and snowing in Washington, D.C., that the politicians were putting their hands in their own pockets! I felt great relief in knowing that the federal government was shut down for a day or two. Finally, we might save some money.

But, wouldn’t you know it, the very next day I heard that the snow and the cold weather were actually costing us billions of dollars. I guess we can’t win for losing.

Oh, did you hear the one about the Washington, D.C., congressman from the south who was out trying to do the people’s business and got caught in the snow storm. It was snowing so badly that he got lost, but remembered the sage advice of a constituent back home.

“If you ever get caught in a snow storm, don’t panic, just wait for a snow plow to come along and follow it,” he was told.

Finally a snow plow came along and he felt relieved and began to follow it. He followed it for 45 minutes until the driver of the snow plow noticed him and got out and asked, “What are you doing following me around?”

The congressman explained that he had gotten lost and was simply following the advice of a wise constituent.

The driver shook his head and said, “Well, now that I am finished with the Wal-Mart parking lot, would you like to follow me over to the Winn-Dixie?”

While Washington was digging out from what they had named “Snowmegedden,” the Bainbridge snow event was not very big. There might have been some accumulation on a backyard deck, but it wasn’t much and didn’t last too long. That’s too bad. I was hoping there would be enough that we might help our city budget out by selling some to the folks up in Vancouver, British Columbia. The Canadians are hosting the Winter Olympics and, as of last Friday, were in dire need of some snow. How ironic that our southern United States were getting more snow than Canada!

Human beings weren’t the only ones enjoying the brief blizzard (at least by south Georgia standards). Little Bit, our wonderful son and dog, was just as excited as the children. He just couldn’t understand what all those floating, little flakes were and would not be satisfied until he was allowed to go outside and chase the flakes.

And, finally, one more question brought about by our snow flurries. We might not have had enough to build any snowmen, but if we had, what would you get if you crossed a snowman and a baker? Are you ready for the answer? Are you sitting down? Frosty the dough-man!